Adult Toy Vending Machines?

POV: You’re walking home from dinner in Valencia and pass a vending machine full of lube and vibrators. Not tucked away in some sketchy alley—just out in the open, glowing under the same fluorescent lights as a pack of gum or a Coke.

At first, I laughed. I even pulled out my phone, convinced it had to be some kind of new-age art installation. But it wasn’t. People kept walking by, unfazed. And then it hit me—this wasn’t a big deal here.

That moment cracked something open in me. Back home, I’d built a sports psychology practice, helping athletes wrestle with letting go of their glory days. But standing in front of that machine, I realized how much energy we waste in the U.S. hiding, policing, and whispering about sex. Here, it wasn’t shameful. It wasn’t taboo. It was simply life.

I couldn’t shake it. I started bringing podcasts like Sex with Emily and picked up Gillian Anderson’s Wants. I  could literally feel my brain rewiring how I viewed sex. Somewhere between those late-night listens and the scribbles in my margins, I realized I wanted to turn my expertise toward a new subject: desire.

Three years later, my practice has completely shifted. What began with a late-night encounter on a Valencia sidewalk has become a career devoted to intimacy, pleasure, and the psychology of sex.

- 34 years old in Valencia, Spain for 11 days